A lot of people manage to disrupt their long-term, healthy relationships seemingly without any reason, or at least that is what they think. It does not take much for a great relationship between two people who love each other to suddenly turn if one, or both of them start acting differently than ever before. The spark and chemistry dissolve and they become estranged from each other, wondering what happened and how they got there.
If you thik that now your relationship of a few years is as stable as possible and that you should not put in any more work into it, you are very wrong. A good relationship is something you hold dear all the time, something you nourish and cherish and never let it suffer. If there is a problem, you fix it. If something is lacking, you make it happen. In addition, if there is too much of anything, you introduce limits. Together, you evolve through time and change the relationship and your roles slightly whenever something new and different happens in your lives.
If you do not take time and effort to keep up with the changes around you and in you, your life together will suffer and once a perfectly good relationship will be ruined. In this article we will explore the most important and most common things that can ruin a great and loving relationship between two people that had all the chances of being life-lasting.
1. Not Taking Care of Yourself
Neglecting to take proper care of yourself and looking your best, just like when you were trying to win over your partner, is a recipe for a disaster. Not only will you look unpresentable no matter where you appear, but your partner could think that they do not deserve your best self. If you do not care what you look like and how that makes them feel or look when you are together, you will certainly ruin things. A lack of drive and the will to improve yourself in life is something people enjoy to see, and what attracts the most. If some of the foundations of why you attracted them lie in your hunger for success, your perfect hygiene, and your sense of fashion, slowing down and then stopping with it entirely will turn them away. This is no longer the person they fell in love with, just a husk of who you used to be.
2. Troubles in the Bedroom
Living in the 21st century, especially right now in 2021, is stressful to say the least. With all the troubles of regular working days, no matter if you are employed or studying, not everyone has time for themselves, let alone for a partner. At the end of a rough day it is often impossible for a person to get turned on and have some fun times in the bedroom with their partner even if both of them want it immeasurably. Sometimes it just does not happen and then you are left with even more troubles and depression on your mind. If you cannot solve this with a better schedule or things like lingerie or toys, you should maybe try some OTC pills for erectile dysfunction. It is nothing to be ashamed off as it happens to millions of men all over the world. Check the list in Riverfronttimes.com if you are interested in finding out more about this.
3. Taking them for Granted
Not paying enough attention you your loving partner is the most common cause of breakups no matter the length of the relationship. This is especially true if you used to be loving and caring, tending to their every need and never taking them for granted. When or if you suddenly stop, they will have a huge hole in their life that they cannot fill in simply because they remember you for a more giving partner who was there. If you no longer do romantic things, suggest things they love, or treat them with an occasional gift so they know you think and care about them, they will become cold. Worst of all, this usually makes people think there is something wrong on their end and become lost in the constant search of what they could have changed. They deserve better so do not take them for granted with no good reason, particularly if nothing happened for you to behave like that.
4. Not Talk or Listen
Talking in a relationship is everything, and general communication is key. Here we do not mean that you should constantly be on the phone with each other when you are not physically together. This is very unhealthy and borderline toxic for the relationship. Talking, and mainly listening to your partner, should be how you solve problems, suggest new things, and plan your future. Without communication you will just be going with the flow with none of you actually stopping to tell the other about your troubles, about the day, about good things that happened and about how you feel in general. How can you ever expect to understand them as a person and best get the hang of who they are and what they expect from life if you never listen to what they have to say?
5. Remember your Interests
It is great if you love spending time with your loved one and do things with them every day. However, if you sometimes feel the need to be on your own, chase your own dream or perform an activity that is not a common interest, it is more than fine. Tell them that you love doing certain things, that they make you truly you, and that it is hard or unpleasant without them. If you enjoy video games or sports, an occasional cycle around the city, or just a short walk around the neighborhood, mention them to your partner and tell them it is something you are used to. When they learn of your interests they will surely support you because they only wish what is good for you. Forgetting about your own needs in a relationship because you are preoccupied with them and your time together is something that bugs a lot of people and they do not know what or how to solve it. Just mention it and start doing what you love again. That is it.